And you thought YOUR family was dysfunctional?!

How does one talk about Darkmans without addressing the completely dysfunctional relationship between Beede and Kane?  One need not venture far to smell that there is certainly something rotten in Denmark.  Out of the astounding 838 pages, it only takes a handful before the reader realizes that this father-son duo is in absolute shambles.  I mean, what son happens to run into their father at a coffee shop and demands, "Beede, why the f*** are you here?" (17)?  Aside from the colorfully disrespectful language, shouldn't this random meeting be considered more of a happy coincidence rather than a dreaded fate?  Don't get me wrong, there are certainly times being on the other side of the globe isn't far enough away from certain unnamed relatives, but the banter between this gruesome twosome certainly does not give off the fuzziest of feelings.  As uncomfortable as their relationship made me feel at times, it never appeared to faze them.  Their interactions with one another were completely normal and par for their twisted course.  It is as if they fed off of each other.  It is as if they yearned for it.  I believe that there is an absolutely perfect selection that so precisely sums up their relationship: "And because Beede, his father, was so exquisitely dull (celebrated a kind of immaculate dullness-he was the Virgin Mary of the Long Hour) Kane had gradually engineered himself into his father's anti.  If Beede had ever sought to underpin the community then Kane had always sought to undermine it.  If Beede lived like a monk, then Kane revelled in smut and degeneracy.  If Beede felt the burden of life's weight (and heaven knows, he felt it), then Kane consciously rejected worldly care" (20).   This strained relationship is paramount to the "plot" of this novel and without it, we would sadly miss the je ne sais quoi that these lovely lads possess.  I wonder though, would they be equally interesting if they were on their own?  Would they demand as much attention or consideration if they did not interact with one another?  I seriously think not.  Beede without Kane is like peanut butter without jelly.  Kane without Beede is like Batman without Robin.  It just wouldn't work.  I'm certainly not saying that I desire this type of relationship with my parental units, but I am saying that there is a definite and dare say, required amount of dysfunction in every relationship for it to function on a normal level.